Emerging with the Snowdrops
~ Reflections on emerging from an inner winter.~
This is an example of my fortnightly SOUL NOTES.
You can sign up to receive Soul Notes here.
Grey. A bit of sun. Then more grey. The sun has been playing hide and seek here in my part of the UK this last week!
Now, sometimes fluffy white-grey clouds can feel like a comforting cocoon to me. But this last week? It’s like the colour had been drained from everything. And my energy felt drained with it.
And yet…
In my garden and on my daily walks I’ve noticed the distinctive green of the foliage of snowdrops courageously pushing up through the cold, dark soil.
And I know that soon they’ll be flowering and will be dancing their pure, white radiance against the still, bare earth.
For the beginning of February in the northern hemisphere brings Imbolc – the first day of spring in the old Wheel of the Year.
(While in the southern hemisphere it’ll be Lammas, the abundance of nature and the subtle turn towards autumn).
And I’m feeling something within me stir.
A call to re-engage. To re-emerge.
In some ways I’m having to re-emerge, as my new book is published on the 1st of Feb, and I’m currently recording podcast interviews and writing articles to help promote it.
But it feels deeper than that.
Because for these last few years I’ve felt like I’ve been in a cave. Not just for the last two years of the pandemic, but longer than that.
Since 2018, the year I began my Priestess training, I’ve been on a profound healing journey, excavating the depths of my psyche. Following a call I could no longer ignore.
Perhaps you’ve experienced this too in your life?
The Death-Rebirth Goddess took me by the hand as I descended into the shadows in my soul to see and acknowledge the deep emotional wounds that were calling to be recognized and offered recognition and healing.
And it’s no coincidence that, over the past couple of years, I’ve realized that I’m in perimenopause.
Midlife is, I believe, a sacred rite of passage that calls us to face our deepest wounds.
It’s an initiatory process of descent and return.
It asks you to hold yourself in fierce compassion.
It asks you to rediscover yourself and to mother yourself and hold strong boundaries and to prioritize self-care and soul-care so you can withstand the strength of the energies working on and through you.
It asks you to transition from Wounded Maiden to the Mature Feminine archetype of the Queen and be reborn as the wisest and most fully expressed version of yourself.
I’m still in it. I know there’s much inner work still to do.
And yet, like the snowdrops, I feel a calling to re-emerge somehow. While at the same time, knowing that rushing into this emergence may be too much.
This is the dance of this time of year!
The following poem, which features in both Cycles of Belonging and Whispers From Mother Earth, expresses these push-pull impulses:
In This Space
Bare branches, against a bright, blue sky.
Sap is rising, yet I will wait awhile.
Spring is coming yet I am happy at the cusp,
Knowing life is reawakening but I don’t need to rush.
Here in this liminal space as the wheel turns
I find myself resisting the fire which is ready to burn.
“Slow down, no rush, all in good time,”
A voice within my soul whispers “to yourself, be kind.
Here in this space between winter and spring
Connect with the joy the Inner Child can bring.
Be silly, be vibrant, enjoy life and play.
The time to birth dreams will soon have its day.”
Does that resonate with you? If so, let yourself wait awhile.
Remember that if flowers bloom too early they can get damaged by frosts. Tune into the natural intelligence of life. Dream, and begin to plant seeds of intention in early spring, tend to the new shoots and leaves with care and attention. All in good time.
And for my readers in the southern hemisphere. As Lammas builds to the fullness of the abundance of nature and the first harvests, how can you feel this energy expressing itself in your life? In your soul?
*
As ever, I hope my words resonate with you dear one.
I share my experience with you as I strongly believe that by sharing our stories we help each other to feel less alone.
And to remind you that life is cyclic, a constant flow. Spiralling through the archetypal energies of growth, fullness, release, death and rebirth.
And whether you’re in the northern hemisphere where life is re-emerging, or you’re in the southern hemisphere where nature is at its peak, perhaps you too can dance with this energy and let it guide you to express the truth of what your soul is yearning for.
So, until next time...
May the Dark Moon bless you with her wisdom and intuitive knowing, and may you find the answers you are looking for within your heart and soul ... and trust yourself.
And I wish you the blessings and joy of Imbolc or Lammas!
With love & the blessings of fierce + tender self-compassion,
Stella x
Next steps
If you would like to explore these topics further then check out my Imbolc and Early Spring resource.
This Sacred Seasons resource will guide you to honour yourself through Imbolc season with meditation, ritual and soul guidance.
And it will guide you to activate the energies of emergence, new beginnings and possibilities and The Maiden archetype.
